Reiki Self-Practice, Interrupted

As a reiki practitioner and teacher, I always do my best to practice what I preach.  I encourage my students to have a regular self-practice.  I know from my own experience how valuable it is to take time every day, to clear my mind and listen to what my body is doing and what it needs.  I understand that this is often where my inner wisdom has its platform to come forward and give expression.

 Over the past several weeks, I had been experiencing a lot of stress often feeling like I didn’t have the time or energy for my usual reiki self-practice.  During this time, I began feeling pretty down on myself and old thinking and feeling patterns began resurfacing.  My inner critic had reclaimed its old territory.   My anxiety was through the roof; sleeping became difficult and my mood had become disheartened. 

The other day, I had a moment to breathe, ok actually, I may have been grasping for air, but I managed to give myself reiki for the first time in almost a month.  What came up for me, were the reiki principle’s, also known as the reiki precepts. 

            Just for today,

                        I will not be angry

                        I will not worry

                        I will do my work honestly

                        I will give gratitude for my many blessings

                        I will be kind to every living thing.

As you can see, they are very simple, but sometimes things are easier said than done.  I was aware that I had been worrying quite excessively; worrying about how well or not I have been doing with my work and my commitments, being a mother, a partner and the list goes on.  These worries quickly escalated into every facet of my life and then ultimately I ended up thinking and feeling that everything I do, say; everything I am, is not good enough.  This is my own self critic, my own personal thinking patterns that I have worked years to tame, and here they were rearing their ugliness causing doubt and fear at every level of my being.   It happened so quickly, luckily it didn’t last any longer than it did!

When I break these principles down, I am first met with, “Just for today,” and am immediately reminded that I only need to be in the present moment.  When I am fully IN and WITH the present moment, I have a better chance of truthfully evaluating what is actually going on in my life, my environment and the situation at hand.  Practicing reiki on myself, brings me into this moment, and the place within myself that I find objectivity, acknowledgement, accountability and truth.

Focusing on the third principle, “I will do my work honestly”, prompted questioning of my inner work and evaluation of just how honest I have been with my own self?  I realize, that contrary to my feelings over the prior weeks, that indeed I have done well; I HAVE done a really good job, in fact.  The mounting anxiety and irrational thinking were absolutely signs that I wasn’t taking good care of myself.  But, in actuality, those same signs were also realizations that prior to this past month, I had been taking really good care of myself.  I also realized that my tolerance for negative self-talk, self-doubt has grown less and less acceptable without even realizing it.   This awareness of personal growth and progress has offered me comfort and joy; something that I can really be grateful for.  I am brought back to my center and have regained balance.

The gentle flow of energy that reiki is, a simple practice of self-care, has rested powerfully within me, yet again!  I have recommitted to my daily self-practice and I invite you all to do the same.

Hilary Denton